Although there are some societies in which men cry along with women after bereavement,
whenever differences are found it is the men who inhibit the expression
of grief (Rosenblatt 1976).
Age
While newborn babies cry when separated, true grief depends on the
development of object constancy, the idea that others continue to exist
when not near. This begins by the end of the first year.
Toddlers play 'death games' but the idea that the dead do not return
takes longer to become established, even so they do grieve when separated
for any length of time.
In later childhood, children grieve in much the same way as adults but
their grief is often complicated by the failure of parents and others
to communicate with them about these important events in their lives (Oltjenbruns
2001). Misunderstandings commonly arise and may cause later problems.
Although bereavements are common in old age, the elderly often grieve
less than younger persons, perhaps because they are better prepared for
loss (Lund 1989).
Culture
Religious and other cultural beliefs, rituals and mores have a considerable
influence on grief. At times of war and among martial races the inhibition
of grief is common (Parkes 1996).
Type of Bereavement
The stronger the attachment the greater the grief.
Loss of a Child
In the West the loss of a child usually gives rise
to the most intense and lasting grief, mothers are particularly
vulnerable to the loss of young children (Stroebe
2001b.).
In countries where people have large families because they expect
children to die this is not the case (Scheper-Hughes
1992).
Parental Loss
The loss of a parent is most traumatic when the child is young
and/or has not become autonomous.
Conjugal Loss
Severe reactions to the loss of a spouse often reflect intense,
dependent or ambivalent attachments (Parkes
2004).
Mode of Death
Deaths that are both unexpected and untimely, particularly if by human
agency and/or accompanied by violence or mutilation are particularly traumatic
and may give rise to severe anxiety/panic, post-traumatic stress, and/or
delayed grief (Stroebe 2001).
Personal Vulnerability
Risk factors for problematic bereavement are (Parkes
2004):
unusually close or clinging attachments,
ambivalent relationships,
lack of confidence/self-esteem,
distrust of others and
previous history of mental health problems.
Social Supports
Social isolation and families that are seen as unsupportive give rise
to intense loneliness and complicated grief after bereavement, particularly
in old age (Raphael 1984).
